How to handle being a Single Parent

Being a single parent may mean three things: you are divorced, a widow, or happily married but with your spouse is working very far from you, and seldom comes home. Though maybe these three situations have a common factor, they still have different approach towards being a GOOD parent.

1.0 DIVORCED: This is a tough situation especially if your divorce has just started. Chances are the kids do not understand the situation. There may be times your children would want to be with your former spouse which will make you more upset, considering that you EX has a good reason to be divorced. What parents should realize is that the children need the better (or worst) half too; and they have their own right even the law may disagree with it. That’s the truth, although it hurts! Furthermore, avoid telling stories to your children about the “wrongdoings” of your EX. After all, you may also have some of it too. And chances are your stories will be one-sided only. This way, you are teaching them not to hate. Let them research the “truth” and then decide for themselves. By doing this, you are also teaching them to be intelligent, analytical, and not to be judgmental. It will also be an advantage for you. Time will pass, you may learn to forgive, but of course, not forget.

2.0 WIDOW: Loosing your EVERDEAREST will crash your world, and sometimes may make you be the loneliest person ever to live! Mourning and crying is very natural for a normal person. However, you must not entertain this for a long time. Though it is better said than done, but you have to move on. Remember that you are still alive and your children will depend on you, especially now that there is no one else to run to. It is now that they need you most. Use your children as inspirations to re-build your life to be strong again. Accept the fact, and later on, you will understand the reason why it all happened. You may not realize this at once, but the hardest times in our lives can make us a better person, someday.

3.0 HAPPILY MARRIED BUT “ALONE”: There are times that someone in the house has to work away just to earn good money for the future of the children. This is very true, and “they” are increasing here in the Philippines. No wonder why children nowadays seem to be lost. But what parents should realize is that they belong to a happy family with big financial problems. This means that the only problem to solve is how to have a higher income. Here are some important things to be considered doing first before leaving:

3.1 Explain it to your children very well, including the advantage and disadvantage. They may not approve your decision but at least they have the right to know what is happening, and will possibly happen.
3.2 Be prepared for the result, and anticipate the worst. Do not be overwhelmed with the possible positive effect. Remember, it will be the whole family who will shoulder the hardship.
We are now in the generation where communication may be as fast as a lightning. During the first months, have some money to buy a PC and other gadgets for on-line communication. This is a very important factor to maintain the happy family.
3.3 Lastly, do not forget who you are working for…the children and their future. If you feel there will be a great danger if one of you is not around, stay “home” and do your best shot to make ends meet. After all, your savings will depend on your lifestyle.

I CHOSE THE LAST ONE…

Article Source:Effective Parenting Tips